Compassion
Key Points: Most people are too hard on themselves and I see little to no benefit to “tough” coaching. I’m here to support you and I will never judge or make you feel bad.
This is part of my 3-part series explaining my Core Values. As I’ve said in my other posts, I didn’t fully understand the reasoning behind core values until I had been in the Marines for about 8 years. They seemed like gimmicky nonsense that didn’t actually matter. Since then, my opinion has drastically changed and I regularly refer back to Honor, Courage, and Commitment when I make Marine Corps decisions. They’re the answer to so many questions when you aren’t sure what to do. My core values are Compassion, Commitment, and Results. I want to explain why I chose each of these. In other posts I’ve talked about talked about Commitment and Results. Today I want to explain what I mean by Compassion.
The gym can be an intimidating place. Many of the biggest, strongest guys at any given gym didn’t start out that way. And even if they did, they are usually the most excited to share their knowledge with new people. They’re excited when someone keeps showing up day after day. I dislike Planet Fitness in large part because they portray people who work hard in the gym as judgmental jerks, when they are generally anything but.
But I also recognize that there is an intimidating aspect to going someplace where you feel a strange sense that you have to prove yourself. One of the most interesting things about being a Marine is the compassion I have for things that my daughters are currently going through that most adults don’t have even the faintest memory of. I understood, on a level my wife couldn’t, the fear and excitement my daughters felt on their first days of school. I had, only 10 years ago, stepped onto Brown Field in Quantico, VA, with the same mix of excitement and dread. When my daughters had fears about swimming I reminded myself that I’d seen fully grown 18 year old men who wouldn’t think twice about running towards a machine gun absolutely freak out in water. There is no shame in any of this.
People often don’t believe me when I say I’ve become a much more compassionate person because of my experiences in the Marine Corps. I have openly cried in front of other Marines and have never once been made to feel bad about it. This, in turn, has helped me to be open with other people in ways I never thought I could, secure in the knowledge that there is nothing wrong with me for having doubts, insecurities, or fears.
If you have doubts, insecurities, and fears about any of this, I want you to know you aren’t alone. I have GAD (generalized anxiety disorder) and only fake it better than most people. I promise to provide a safe space, much in the way a therapist does, to express your insecurities and work through them, free from judgment.